Category: Best life

Best life, Motherhood

Taking a decent self-timer family photo.

Featuredby laurenwesley6280Leave a Comment on Taking a decent self-timer family photo.

If you follow me on instagram, you saw that we spent our morning this morning getting our 2020 family Easter photo!

Happy Easter, 2020. Self-timer photo from our iphone, at home. 3/11/2020.

That being said, with everything going on in the world right now, getting a family Easter photo really doesn’t matter. I get that. But, I love this time of year. I love cute spring clothes. I love getting a family Easter photo every year with our family… and I didn’t want to miss this year, even given the state of the world. So, yes… family photos and Easter outfits don’t really matter. But, what does matter is making memories with people that we love… and doing things that bring us joy. And, this brings me joy So, while we cannot control what is out of our control, we can control adding things that bring us joy to our days and to our families.

So… if you want to try a self timer photo for yourself, I’ve outlined a few easy steps to get the best image. (And, by “best image,” I mean something decent. Maybe not perfect. Expectations are everything. And, I recommend having low ones for this little project. Then you’ll be pleasantly surprised with the outcome, hopefully)!

6 Steps to a good decent family photo at home:

Pick a spot:

First things first, decide where you want to take your photo. We were supposed to have rainy weather this morning, so I fully expected to have to choose an indoor spot. But, the rain came later than expected, and we got some good sunlight in the morning. So, we pivoted to take our pic by the front door. That being said, wherever you choose, you want LOTS of natural light, and a clear, crisp, uncluttered background, if possible.

Test your lighting:

Once you’ve picked a spot, or two, test the lighting. Take a few pictures either of the spot alone. Or, even better, a test shot or two with you in it to see how the lighting looks. You can always lighten up a photo (as I talked about in my mobile photo editing post), but you still want lots of natural light for a good image. Here are a few basic test shots I took, below:

I ended up going with the front door, after also testing inside by the fireplace. I liked the bright whites inside, but we got more natural light out front.

Set up you phone

The next step is to set up your phone! Everyone thinks you need some sort of fancy tripod and all of this technology to get a professional looking self timer photo. But, honestly, since we’re all at home anyway, all you need is something tall enough to set your phone up on to be high enough to take an eye level photo. Here’s the set up I came up with today:

A box on a kids’ chair on a bar stool, and we were ready to go! You don’t need anything fancy. You just need to use your brain.

While we’re on the subject of setting up your phone, there is a built in self timer option on the iphone now. To get there, open up your camera on the phone, then flip the screen around so you’re looking at yourself like you’re about to take a selfie. There’s a little arrow pointing up at the top of the screen when you’re in selfie mode. Tap that. Then, you will see a few other options come up below your face. The second from the left should look like a clock. Tap on that. From there, you have 3 options: “Timer off,” “3 s” and “10s.” That’s for 3 seconds and 10 seconds respectively. I recommend clicking on 10s, to give yourself a 10 second countdown. Once you’ve hit that, you push the big white button at the bottom, like you would if you were normally taking a pic… but the 10 second countdown will begin. And, good news, it’s big and bold in the middle of the screen. You can’t miss it! We like to count down out loud, so everyone knows when to smile.

Take a million shots

Here’s the fun part! Try as many as you can until everyone gets worn out. For us, today, we only got 9. about 9. But, 9 is better than 1 to choose from.

I go through and heart my favorites afterwards, to know which ones we want to edit.

I don’t even look at the pics as we’re taking them. Just push the button, pose, smile. And do it again and again.

That being said, my family is VERY used to doing self time photos… but if this is your first time getting everyone together for one of these, maybe look at the first few to see how everyone looks and reposition if you need to. The beauty is, you can do them again and again.

Get close and have fun

One thing I’ve learned form lots of family photos is that if everyone is really close to each other, touching lots, and having fun, the pics turn out better. So don’t be afraid to lean in, laugh, hug, try a new pose, and go again. Have fun with it. But, I promise you, you’ll like the photos better where you’re all squishing in, touching each other, and looking like you love each other.

And, finally, once you have a couple of good shots: Edit them!

I have a whole blog post on mobile photo editing. Seriously, nothing fancy here – just a few clicks to lighten up a photo, or blur a photo background.

Editing makes a world of difference, though. See my before and after below:

The pic on the right is lightened a touch, the background is blurred, and it’s cropped to a square.

And, that’s it, my friends. Here are our final products for our Easter Family photo, 2020.

Easter 2020. Yes, I know the door is open in these photos. I left it open intentionally to remind us in years to come of all the time we were spending inside right now.
Best life, Goals, Motherhood

You can do it.

by laurenwesley6280Leave a Comment on You can do it.
Dustin with his medal at the finish line of the Austin marathon. 2/16/20

He did it, you guys! Dustin finished a 26.2 mile marathon on Sunday. 26.2 freaking miles in under four hours.

But, if you would have asked me two years ago – when we had 2 kids under 3– if we would ever be able to fit something like this into our lives, I would have probably said no.

But, I’ve been about all about chasing dreams, and pursuing personal goals lately. Because, our kids are watching. And, I believe that the better we take care of ourselves, the better we can take care of our kids. So, Dustin and I have prioritized “us” a lot more lately. Because happy parents make for happy kids. And, having big goals, in many ways, makes both of us happy. So, this year, we each stretched for something big.

I think this first part is worth talking about, because NO ONE does: Having teeny tiny kids was really hard for us at first. Or, really hard for me, at least. And, consequently, it was sometimes hard on hard on our marriage. The identity shift from married couple to parents was… hard. And, finding our groove, helping each other, being a team, finding time for our relationship, and finding time for ourselves all took some time and serious effort, if we’re being real.

And, look, we haven’t perfected it. But, I think we’ve figured a few things out in the last several years. And, I am hoping that writing about it might help someone out there too. And, if you are in the weeds  – with a tiny baby – and looking at this post thinking “I could never work something like a marathon into my life right now” you are not alone. Because that’s exactly how I felt a few years ago. I didn’t know how we would ever find time for ourselves again as parents, honestly. You have to give yourself some grace in that season. But, eventually, you will also find your way out.

Jack’s 3rd birthday in the summer of 2019.

Now our kids are almost 2 and 4, and we’re out of the double diaper weeds.  We’ve gotten to focus on our relationship and ourselves more lately. We’ve chosen to focus on our relationship and ourselves more. Because happy, fulfilled parents make for happy kids. It’s like the famous line you hear on every flight “put your own oxygen mask on first before helping others.” If we’re burnt out and drained, we can’t serve anyone. But, if we fill our own cups – our cups will overflow so much that we’ll have MORE to give everyone else.

But, being able to do this definitely takes some strategy. Especially, when priority number one is as much quality time with your kids as possible. There’s no point in filling your cup to the brim if it takes all your time away from your family.


So, you gotta’ be strategic.

This year D and I both had goals: Dustin to complete a marathon, and me to go to Pilates 4x/week (and start a blog)! But in order for us to work these things into our insane schedule, it took a lot of supporting each other, and timing.

Dustin trained early in the morning. Most mornings, he was awake, ran several miles, and was sipping coffee before Jack, Grace, and I even woke up.  And, for me to fit in pilates at least 4 times a week, I had to get creative with my schedule: working classes in at the end of my work day before Rosa (our nanny) headed home. And, working on my blog late at night.

On the weekends, Dustin would run in the morning while I was with the kids.  Then, we’d high five as he got home, and I’d head to my class. It took some planning to be able to do this. But it was SO worth it. Both of us getting to work on our own goals made us happier, healthier, and more fulfilled. We’d come back energized and excited for time with our family. By filling up our cups, we had more to give.

Because, let me tell you: I’ve been the burnt-out mom. Working all the hours, not getting sleep, not investing in myself. Feeling too guilty to leave my family to go do something for myself. And, you know what? I wasn’t a happy mom. I wasn’t a great mom. Being gone for that hour to take care of my body, to invest in myself, to do something for me…it fills me up. It brings me joy. It gives me ALL the energy to bring back home to the people that are my everything. It makes me better for me, and it makes me better for them.

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but if it’s you: If you’re the burnt out parent. If you’re running on empty. If you’re feeling guilty about working something good for yourself into your day or into your week, DO IT. Do the thing. Work it in. Find time for your partner to work it in too. Maybe it’s not exercise for you. Maybe it’s not every day. But, speaking form experience, being a happier person 100% makes me a better mom. Do the thing for you, so you have more to give to them.

It will take a little strategy. It will take planning with your partner (if you have one). But it will be worth it. You can do it, friend! Go get ‘em.

Best life, Motherhood

Chasing dreams… for them.

by laurenwesley62804 Comments on Chasing dreams… for them.

I do all the things for them. Sometimes I do them for me, so I can be whole for them. But, when it really comes down to it, I do them for them.
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Like tonight, for instance. Tonight I went to a “Toastmasters” (public speaking) group meeting. I signed up for it weeks ago. But when tonight actually got here, I nearly talked myself out of going at least 10 times. What if everyone knew each other already? What if I couldn’t learn something? What if it made me uncomfortable? What if. What if. What if.
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But I went. I went for them. I mean, I went for me. But I really went for them. Let me explain.
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I’ve always loved public speaking. Ever since I was a little girl, I’ve dreamed of being a professional speaker. Inspiring people. Being a keynote. Changing lives. It’s part of why I got into sales.
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But, somewhere along the way, I lost that dream. I stopped perusing it. Sure, I speak for a living now in sales. I get to inspire people. But, on stages? To masses? I haven’t practiced that in years. If I’m honest, it makes me nervous as hell.
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So, tonight, I took one small step towards that dream. Of being a regular public speaker. You know why? FOR THEM.
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A few months ago, I heard something on a podcast that really stuck with me. I could write a whole post on this one thing. But, to sum it up, the speaker said that we can’t spend our children’s whole childhood telling them that they can be anything. Encouraging them, coaching them, telling them to follow their dreams… if we don’t also follow our own. He said eventually, one day, they would notice. One day they’d ask “What about you mom?” The words made me cry as I heard them “What about you?”
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So, tonight, I followed a dream. I set the example. I did the thing. Because if I do one thing on this planet. If I set one example, if I leave one legacy, I will be a mother who never stoped chasing her dreams. Even if I’m 35. Even if I’m a mother of 2. Even if it’s scary. Because it’s what I want them to do too. And, they are watching. ✨

Best life, Motherhood

These are the days.

by laurenwesley62802 Comments on These are the days.

My sister and I woke up to the same song every morning for years: “These are the Days.” It was a great way to start the morning, and always a reminder to make the most of the day, because one day we’d look back on those middle and high school days and they would be amazing memories.
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Fast forward to today. I’m 35, and while I no longer wake up to that song every morning, I’m realizing, yet again, that THESE are the days.
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So, I’m writing down the little things. I’m taking the pictures. I’m soaking it in and enjoying the moments, because these ARE the days.
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This morning was the best kind of lazy Saturday. We stayed in pajamas until late morning. I didn’t even make it to my coffee until we’d all be up 2 hours. We played baseball in the house. I chased the kids in circles in the kitchen while Dustin and my wedding song played on repeat (because I’m cool like that). We had plans to go a bunch of places, and never left the house.
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Dustin got up early and ran 20 miles because he’s training for the Austin marathon. I write that detail too because I’m SO proud and impressed with him. And, seeing Grace hug him when he walked back in the door was really basically everything. It made my heart burst.
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Not all of our days are beautiful. Some are messy, and hard, and exhausting. But THIS Saturday, this was one for the books. I’m writing it all down and sharing it here because “these are the days that we’ll remember.” ✨

Best life, Uncategorized

Mobile Photo Editing

by laurenwesley62803 Comments on Mobile Photo Editing
  • Original
  • Edited

Some of my favorite influencers have shared their tips and tricks for beautiful, light, and bright photos. And, I was so grateful for them sharing this info. So, I’m passing it along to all of you. First we’ll start with tips for great photos. Then, we will dive into the two tools that I use to edit my photos before I post them online.

First things first, tips for a great photo:

  1. Use Natural Light – I think the best photos are taken in natural light. Ideally, earlier in the morning, or later in the day (late afternoon/evening) when the sunlight isn’t too harsh. For indoor photos of people, turn off all the lights in the house – and get near a window. This lets the natural light do it’s thing. From there, you can always brighten up with Lightroom (one of the tools I love) if you feel like it’s too dark without the lights on.
  1. Clear the clutter – This one is easy, but so often overlooked! If you’re taking pics of kids, or people, or something in your house, get rid of all the clutter in the background! If you push any toys or junk out of the frame of the photo, the eye will draw to the subject of the photo. And, the image will look clean and crisp! *Note – this one doesn’t really matter if your just trying to capture memories. Capture memories! Capture real life. Let it be messy. But, if it’s for a Holiday Card, or for another reason you want a professional looking crisp photo, clear the clutter. 🙂
  1. Take a million pics! – Seriously, to get one good photo, especially of a family or kids, it’s going to take a lot of tries. Be ok with taking 20 pics to find the ONE you want to edit and share. Plus, sometimes when you take a ton, you end up getting a really good “real” and natural photo of the kids or you in your element that you wouldn’t get if you only took 2 or 3 pics.

Ok, now for the best tools I have found to easily edit pics on the go. Seriously, it takes me 1-5 minutes to edit a picture. And these are the two best tools I know of:

  1. Lightroom (cost: I use the free version. Upgraded version is $9.99/month). This tool allows you to edit exposure, contrast, highlights, shadows, whites, and blacks, as well as adjust the temp, tint, and vibrance. You can also crop with the basic version of this tool. For light and bright photos: up the exposure, decrease the contrast, always get rid of a lot of the “shadow” and increase the “whites.”

2. FaceTune (cost: $2.99 – worth it) : I use FaceTune for 2 things: to blur the background of a photo, and to brighten the “whites.”

So, here’s the deal: FaceTune can technically be used to blur out wrinkles, fix blemishes, whiten teeth, etc. I don’t do any of that (anymore). I believe we already filter ourselves and our images enough – smoothing wrinkles and whitening teeth is too much. It’s too fake.

That being said, I for sure use it to edit my photos. The “blur background” tool is really easy to use, and I like to use the “whiten” tool to make my whites brighter. (Like if I have a white kitchen in the background – I will use it to make the white’s pop).

I also occasionally use FaceTune to “patch” something like a stain on the kids’ shirts, or a spill on the ground that looks messy. (I did this for our Christmas card this year – we were standing in front of a big old mural, and the gravel on the ground had a bunch of dirt spots and spills – I just made them all one color so the image would be cleaner and so that people could focus on the cute saying on the wall and the people in the picture, instead of the dirt on the ground).

Ok, that’s it! These are my tips to get (what I believe to be) great photos! Have a great day everyone.

Oh… and please let me know if you found this useful. Either here, by commenting on the blog, or on the original instagram post. I would SO appreciate it. xo.

Best life, Motherhood

Take three slow breaths.

by laurenwesley62804 Comments on Take three slow breaths.
Take three slow breaths.

A wise leadership coach once told my team at work and me no matter what our day looked like, no matter how tired we were, how stressed we were, how hungry we were, or how annoyed we were with our day, to take THREE . SLOW . BREATHS . before walking in the door when we got home.

Since I work form home, for me it was actually three slow breaths before I walked OUT the door of my home office and into the rest of our home. When I learned about this practice, it was before we had kids. It was just Dustin, Coop (our dog) and me. I think it’s even more important once you have a family. But, the reason for doing it was the same then as it is now: to stop, transition from hectic day, and approach the people you love as the person you most want to be. Not as the tired version. Not as the stressed version. Not the hangry version of yourself. But, as the one your loved ones signed up to share their lives with. To show up as the best version of you.

So, I did it back then. Three slow breaths before I finished work and joined Dustin in out in the kitchen. I showed up with a smile. I showed up with energy. I consciously showed up without complaining about whatever stressed me out that day. I tried, when I remembered at least, to show up consciously as the best version of me.

Flash forward to present day, and this is more important than ever. For many of us, we’re parents now. And, when we walk in the door, it’s not just to our partner. But, it’s to our family. Our people. Our teeny tiny tribe. The ones who call us “Mom.” And, because of that, I’m doing it again: Three. Slow. Breaths. before I walk in the door. I had lost touch with this practice for a while. But, it’s back because I want to show up for them. It’s back because walking through that door with positive energy, will lead to positive vibes for everyone. At dinnertime. At bath time. At bedtime. It sets the tone for the whole routine. It sets the tone for the night.

And, the night may seem like just one night. But, when you really think about it, we live that night every night. And, those repeat nights become our life.

After all, life is not about big things. It’s not the birthday parties, or the vacations, or the long weekends at the lake. It’s not the days at the zoo, or Paw Patrol Live shows, or anything else big, cool, or monumental that we do together. The moments that make up our lives are the things we do repeatedly. The moments that happen over and over, day after day, night after night. These are the moments ARE our life. So, with that, I’m going to show up.

I’m not going to get it right every time. I’m not going to be perfect. But, I am going to try. Because as much as all the other stuff matters…. What matters the most is how I show up for my family. What matters are the moments with them. So, moving forward, night after night, I will take those three. slow. breaths. I will SHOW UP as my very best me.

So, before you head home from work, or your work out, or errands, from volunteering out of the house. Before you come home from whatever it is, try the three.slow. breaths. ❤ I hope it works for you, like it has for me before.

xoxo,

Lauren

And, P.S. Dustin does this so well too. Better than I do, and I admire him for it. Hence the pic on instagram sending you here for the read.